Bookish

A political manifesto inspired by literary heroes.

It is time for a change. Britain has tired of dull politicians who get nothing done. Give me the key to the door and I, like a lovable knave, promise you magical mayhem and popular poppycock, different but never dull. You will see me grow in stature, or possibly shrink when it suits, levelling up or levelling down. I shall let my cabinet run where they will in a race to the finish and all shall be winners or else risk losing their heads. Encouraging camaraderie, my team will enjoy garden tea parties, though should anyone present accept my offer of wine I shall tell them, ‘There isn’t any’. When captaining games, I promise always to play by the rules but with some flexibility knowing that rules, like flamingos’ necks, can sometimes be bent. So realise your dreams and elect a leader determined to transform Britain into a wonderland.