Well-known works of literature reconstituted as tweets (i.e. texts of up to 140 characters including spaces). Time’s beginning is time’s...

A poem about smells Glory be to God for all we smell – For blossom’s balm born on a springtime gust; For oven-odours – crusty,...

The worst possible title for a poem followed by the poem on that title An Odd Ode upon Odoriferous Odious Old Odours Sometimes I sniff a...

The facts of life explained by a well-known character from a novel. “It’s a doddle, dear,” said the White Rabbit, “more a matter of bucks...

A Shakespearian soliloquy delivered by the ghost of Richard III reflecting on the discovery of his bones in a Leicester car-park An ‘R’,...

A feature a travel supplement as it might have been written by a well-known novelist, alive or dead Though few, unlike me, can afford to...

A schoolchild’s quick and clever excuse to escape punishment Please sir, you gave us all such pleasure When you taught us Davies’...

An extract from the diary of a well-known historical figure that startlingly reverses received ideas about history and the person in...

The profile for an on-line dating site of A Shakespearian character Dismiss my vice, ‘tis virtue that in verse I tender, offer, proffer –...

An unwelcome note of reality introduced into a song from a musical. Let’s skip to the terrible ending, A very sad place I know, When you...

A new National Anthem for Greece From Mount Olympus, mighty Zeus, Your fearsome thunderbolts let loose And spare us from the wretched...

A poem for the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee as it might have been written by a previous Poet Laureate Oh wondrous Elizabeth, heir of George...

Snippets of misleading advice for tourists visiting Britain. Engage with the British wry sense of humour in airport queues with such...

An encapsulation of a well-known poem in 4 lines These addled musings point to nothing much: A railway Halt, a cough, a hiss, some trees,...

A sonnet using the following set rhymes: Pig, bat, cat, wig, jig, hat, rat, fig, lie, red, sob, die, bed, sob. ‘This heinous...

A recipe as it might have been written by an author of one’s choice. Gather unto thyself the fruits of the forest, kindling and wood, a...

A poem lamenting an impulse buy on eBay ‘Mint condition guaranteed,’ it said, ‘Sleep Inducer.’ Long bereft of zest And dying to relax for...

A refutation of Philip Larkin’s assertion: ‘They fuck you up your mum and dad’ You lying toad! Your love of booze Together with that...

A parody, with a Christmas connection, of a living British writer with an international reputation (emulating Max Beerbohm’s parodies in...

A poem in which the initial letters of each line read down the page reproduce the last line. Empower me, I pray, Nourish now my art....