Dogs

A poem beginning ‘I do not know much about dogs’

I do not know much about dogs

But I know quite a lot about bears

And badgers and beavers and hogs

And hippos and horses and hares.

I idolise adders and asps

And admire the asinine ass,

I thrill to the grasshoppers’ rasps

As they rub their hind legs in the grass.

I cherish the velvety vole

And delight in the graceful gazelle,

I adore the magnificent mole

And the heavenly hamster as well.

I’m an expert on everyone’s pet

From ferrets to foxes and frogs

But, alas, to my shame and regret,

I do not know much about dogs.