How the other half lives

An extract from the diary of the partner of a famous person

Peter can be so pedantic. This morning I mention the fog and he says, ‘Fog in what sense, my love?’

It’s always the same – never a straight answer. When I tell him how irksome he is he replies, ‘As in tiresome, tedious or oppressive, my dearest?’ Dearest indeed! I might be his dearest but daily he costs me ever more dear. We never communicate like ordinary couples. If I ask what he wants for breakfast all I get is an endless list of words he associates with ‘breakfast’ and by the time he’s finished whatever I cook is too cold to eat.

Perhaps I should have realised my mistake at the altar when he asked the vicar if by ‘lawful’ he meant by ‘sufferance’ or by ‘claim’. Mother was right! He really can be annoying, bothersome, exasperating, infuriating, irksome, irritating, maddening, provoking, tedious, trying, vexatious, wearisome. etcetera, etcetera…

(Mary Roget)