A speech that Shakespeare, as a boy, might have delivered as he was slaughtering a calf Friends, townsmen, fellow citizens – rejoice! I...

An application for an inappropriate job written by a character from a poem Dear Sir/Madam, Having considered the attributes required for...

A poem whose lines end with twelve given words in any order: angst, depth, plinth, bilge, film, breadth, pint, scarce, month, wolf,...

A continuation in verse of the statement, ‘The gentleman in Whitehall knows better…’ The gentleman in Whitehall knows better than to say...

A soliloquy by someone prone to Malapropisms or Misquotations To urn her tinder love so sweat My balaclava I shall play And to my liver,...

A visit to Glastonbury en route to Glyndebourne in the style of Roger McGoug. i fancied a weekend of cultureandstuff with a touch of...

A poem containing the line: ‘They couldn’t hit an elephant from there’ Oh, what a vile villain in the Vale of Elah stood, A Philistine...

A verse letter from Noel Coward to T.E. Lawrence and Lawrence’s reply You may or may not be – of that I’m not sure Though you drew ‘tides...

A problem posed in the style of a famous poet to Mary, The Spectator’s agony aunt Dear Mary, aid is if you can, Ay, if you can, There...

A poem in which the opening of Philip Larkin’s ‘Annus Mirabilis’ is adapted so that 1963 becomes 2007 and ‘sexual intercourse’ becomes...

A poem in praise of February Oh, to be in England Now February’s there, With Autumn’s mess swept out of sight And all the branches bare....

A limerick version of a Jane Austen novel. In Bath, Catherine (stars in her eyes) Finds muddles and mishaps arise, It’s no bed of roses...

A poem entitled, ‘Meditation on the M25’ Before the Dome adorned the Thames or London’s Eye revolved, The London Orbital was built and...

A diary extract by Samuel Pepys for July, 2007 July 2007 (not, it seemeth, January 1684). So, up at 5 0’clock, proposing to breakfast,...

An extract from the diary of a famous historical figure 1856, June 29. Confusing month. Spent sixteenth birthday pondering, under the...

A nonsense poem beginning with, ‘They went to sea in a sieve, they did…’ as in Edward Lear’s poem, ‘The Jumblies’ They went to sea in a...

A Spectator ‘Love Bug’ ad written by a well-know literary character Short, compact, eloquently rapsodoosical though slightly skeptacious...

An acrostic poem in support for Boris Johnson’s bid to become Mayor of London in which the first letters of each line spell BORIS FOR...

A short story entitled ‘A Life With a Hole’ Only at night did the sweets in the corner shop come alive and begin to engage in...

A passage describing nine muses for the 21st century to replace the classical muses, Cleo, Urania, Calliope, Melpomene, Euterpe, Erato,...